I just want to write a quick post about how my day has started off.
I guess I should first tell you about yesterday.
My husband left the house at 8:30a.m. and didn't return until 11:45p.m. His company is at the Youth Specialties Convention here in Nashville until Sunday. So needless to say it was a long day. I had mine and Andon's day all scheduled out with school time here at home and plenty of play time. You know with only having one kid you are the playmate! :) But for some reason all throughout the day I felt like I was being attacked. I kept focusing on negative things and just crying and feeling so sad for myself. I even thought to make a list of all the things I am sad about or struggling with and then I told myself that I have so much to be thankful for as well so I better write that list too. I really wanted to write them down, get them out of my head and just give it to God. I'm not going to write out the things here but I will tell you that loneliness has been a big one. Missing my friends and family and Andon's little friends from home so much. I am making new friends here and I am so thankful that God quickly put them in my path. But I still ache inside, just typing this brings tears to my eyes.
Well this morning after I dropped Andon off at his Mom's Day Out I headed to the bookstore. When I was getting out of the car I saw a family of six getting out of their car. Something about them just caught my attention and felt very familiar. I really wanted to talk to the wife. But I thought how can I just walk over to them and tell them that, they will totally think I am crazy!
So I headed to the store and outside were these clearance baskets that I had to go through. As I am going through those baskets one of their kids asks if they can look so the parents stop with him. I thought here's your opportunity! So I asked them if they were on vacation, because it's 9:30 in the morning and they were all dressed up like they were going somewhere. They said they were traveling from Illinois to Florida! So quickly the wife and I started talking and I had told her that we just moved here three months ago from Florida. As I was talking to her I noticed their youngest daughter who they adopted from China had a cleft lip that had been repaired beautifully. I was so excited to tell her all about Andon and show her pictures of my precious boy. It was so nice to be able to tell her how the last few years have gone with surgeries and therapy and see God show himself in so many ways.
Then we started to talk about moving. I was having to fight back the tears (you know, don't want her to think I am crazy)... She said they have moved quite a bit in the last few years due to her husbands job and that it gets easier after the first couple of months. She said she realized that every time they moved God had something better for them where they were going. I told her I got that from God too but have yet to see it. We then got out my bible because she wanted to give me a verse to really soak in. She said she really loved the whole Chapter of Isiah 43. Which happens to be one of my favorites as well. Isiah 43:1 has meant a lot to me. That is the verse I have on the side of my blog. It says...
"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine."
Really, that says's everything to me.
She wanted to read to me Isiah 43:18,19 "Forget the former things; do not dwell in the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."
She said it's just learning to trust Him through this hard time.
And I do.
I just have those days where I have to tell Satan and tell him loud to get behind me! And yesterday I didn't. I was attacked until the time I fell asleep holding my precious little boy. (When Jared's not home at night I let him sleep in my bed :)).
I actually fell asleep with him telling me "Mommy I just want to look at you" while rubbing my face. Does it get any better then that?! Sweet thing.
I am once again amazed by our Heavenly Father. He put me in the path of a family traveling from Illinois to Florida. They were just waiting for TJ Maxx to open to grab their daughter a coat and then getting on their way. Thank you so much God for allowing me to meet Melissa and her family even if it was just for 45 minutes in a book store.
We did exchange e-mail addresses, I just have a feeling we will always be in contact.:)