Friday, November 21, 2008

Just one of those days...

I just want to write a quick post about how my day has started off.

I guess I should first tell you about yesterday.

My husband left the house at 8:30a.m. and didn't return until 11:45p.m. His company is at the Youth Specialties Convention here in Nashville until Sunday. So needless to say it was a long day. I had mine and Andon's day all scheduled out with school time here at home and plenty of play time. You know with only having one kid you are the playmate! :) But for some reason all throughout the day I felt like I was being attacked. I kept focusing on negative things and just crying and feeling so sad for myself. I even thought to make a list of all the things I am sad about or struggling with and then I told myself that I have so much to be thankful for as well so I better write that list too. I really wanted to write them down, get them out of my head and just give it to God. I'm not going to write out the things here but I will tell you that loneliness has been a big one. Missing my friends and family and Andon's little friends from home so much. I am making new friends here and I am so thankful that God quickly put them in my path. But I still ache inside, just typing this brings tears to my eyes.

Well this morning after I dropped Andon off at his Mom's Day Out I headed to the bookstore. When I was getting out of the car I saw a family of six getting out of their car. Something about them just caught my attention and felt very familiar. I really wanted to talk to the wife. But I thought how can I just walk over to them and tell them that, they will totally think I am crazy!

So I headed to the store and outside were these clearance baskets that I had to go through. As I am going through those baskets one of their kids asks if they can look so the parents stop with him. I thought here's your opportunity! So I asked them if they were on vacation, because it's 9:30 in the morning and they were all dressed up like they were going somewhere. They said they were traveling from Illinois to Florida! So quickly the wife and I started talking and I had told her that we just moved here three months ago from Florida. As I was talking to her I noticed their youngest daughter who they adopted from China had a cleft lip that had been repaired beautifully. I was so excited to tell her all about Andon and show her pictures of my precious boy. It was so nice to be able to tell her how the last few years have gone with surgeries and therapy and see God show himself in so many ways.

Then we started to talk about moving. I was having to fight back the tears (you know, don't want her to think I am crazy)... She said they have moved quite a bit in the last few years due to her husbands job and that it gets easier after the first couple of months. She said she realized that every time they moved God had something better for them where they were going. I told her I got that from God too but have yet to see it. We then got out my bible because she wanted to give me a verse to really soak in. She said she really loved the whole Chapter of Isiah 43. Which happens to be one of my favorites as well. Isiah 43:1 has meant a lot to me. That is the verse I have on the side of my blog. It says...

"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine."

Really, that says's everything to me.

She wanted to read to me Isiah 43:18,19 "Forget the former things; do not dwell in the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

She said it's just learning to trust Him through this hard time.

And I do.

I just have those days where I have to tell Satan and tell him loud to get behind me! And yesterday I didn't. I was attacked until the time I fell asleep holding my precious little boy. (When Jared's not home at night I let him sleep in my bed :)).
I actually fell asleep with him telling me "Mommy I just want to look at you" while rubbing my face. Does it get any better then that?! Sweet thing.

I am once again amazed by our Heavenly Father. He put me in the path of a family traveling from Illinois to Florida. They were just waiting for TJ Maxx to open to grab their daughter a coat and then getting on their way. Thank you so much God for allowing me to meet Melissa and her family even if it was just for 45 minutes in a book store.

We did exchange e-mail addresses, I just have a feeling we will always be in contact.:)


Kelly said...

That is SO awesome!! HE knows just what we need, when we need it!!

mommy zabs said...

That is great! I hope you will come to church this Sunday, I would love to see you. My inlaws are in town so I can't hang much this week... But love you and thinking of you.

Brittani said...

What a great story of God's goodness. i will be praying for you this week. I know what it is like to be so very far from home. I know that God WILL provide exactly WHAT & WHO you need while you are away from your Florida Family.

Andrea @ Mommy said...

I just found your blog from doing a random search on twitter on my son's name, Andon. Well, I found you (so, that means our sons are the only two Andon's mentioned on twitter :-)

I will be praying for you and your husband during this transition. You know that God brought you to where you are for a reason and it has to be good. But, that still doesn't mean you won't have strife - that's inevitable right (and sometimes more so for believers).

And, on seeking the church - I can't give any advice (we moved and fell in love with our church on the first visit - first one we visited too!). But, I will say that when you find it, you will know without a doubt that His plan led you there, I'm sure of it!


And, you're Andon is a cute lil' stinker too!!!

Jeannie said...

Don't feel so lonely where you are, there is plenty of family out there. I love this blog concept. I really got to see how life has been for you guys for the last few months. Keep in touch and hopefully we talk soon. We love and miss you guys a whole lot.

Andrea @ Mommy said...

Jen, I didn't see an email so I thought I would just drop this here :-)

Thanks for visiting my site! It's my ministry now so I hope you find it helpful!! I have been able to use my knowledge in saving and start teaching mothers are are low-income - God is good!!

I thought I would share this post on our little Andon!

He's 18 months now (we have two other boys: age 9 and 4) but he sure was a blessing for us with much that he has gone through.

BTW - on twitter I asked you how you came up with the name, I'm just really curious, so I'll tell ya our discovery of the name :-)

We liked the name Landon, but then my friend mentioned, Andon. Well, when I looked it up it came from the name Andrew - whom I was named after (my grandfather). So, he's sort of named after me (but looks exactly like his dad, go figure).

OK - long story but thought it was cute. Since it is a unique name I'm curious. Our oldest son has a very unique name too that even when you google it, you can't find it (unless it's on him).

Take care!

Andrea @ Mommy said...

OK - we both had Landon, seriously :-)!! That's so funny!!!

Thanks for the info. How awful for your lil' guy to have gone through so much! You have to be amazing parents to manage through those! The one time was enough for us! But, did it ever bring us closer to the Lord!

And, I have never struggled with fertility but have so many friends who have. We have one of our good friends who went through a foster to adopt program after struggling for 4 years. As soon as they were approved and on the list (literally like that next week) they got pregnant! God's timing is unpredictable and perfect!

It is truly so nice to have met ya and I'm bookmarking your page now :-)

Largaespada Family said...

Whoa! Jen, God is taking of his precious child, isn't He! What an amazing story. And how wonderful that you were able to fight off the "crazy" feeling to meet another Christian a bookstore...on her way to Orlando. Wow! What an awesome testimony! Thanks for sharing. I will be praying for you. When we moved from GA to Missouri a few year ago, we struggled a whole lot. I've been there with you. But, I can say that you are doing what the Lord is calling you to do each step of the way. The obedience to Him is what will bring you joy! Love your blog and your heart!!!!

Cassie - Homeschooling Four said...

Hey there friend! I hate those days when we allow Satan to get the better of us! He is such a sneaky snake!
I love you and I love the way you share your heart! I hope you are planning a trip down here soon. I would love to see you :)

Jackie Sue said...

I have been so behind on my blog reading...seems to happen a lot lately. These last 3 posts were just great. I love the cigar funny, I laughed outloud. Love that you already decorated for Christmas...are you cold too? I love that! Of course this last post was just like my God, too!!!! I love how He meets us right where we are....He did that for me the other day when I was worried...I read in Joshua where He says, "I will fight for you" and felt such intimate comfort from Him. Hang in there...He is doing a new thing...miss you so much and glad to keep in touch even through the internet! Love you!

Abby said...

I miss you!!!